Category Archives: Lessons


We are going through difficult times. Who had thought that a virus could cause so much havoc? Plans have been disrupted. Schedules have changed and the style of working has changed drastically.

Every morning I wake up thinking that will I get milk today? What rumours will rock today? The deepest of slumber have been jolted by an anxiety, what if…..But life is such.

And that leaves me ashamed. Even though I understand that nothing is in our hands because we are just puppets and yet there is fear and anxiety. Faith and devotion gives us ‘Abhaya’(fearlessness). But me I just tremble. I say that because times are such or is it my own lack of belief in the superior being.

But time and again it is proved that nothing is in our hands. Maybe it is a man made catastrophe, maybe not but the truth is the outcome is beyond us.

There was a picture circulating in whatsapp which resonated with me


The funny part is that this material world is actually a cage where in we have been sent to rehabilitate, so that we can remember our actual position and try to go back to our original abode.

This we understand in our present condition. A virus has made us understand about our actual position; it is also made us understand how powerless we are. Nothing was and nothing will be in our control.

We may gloat of our material accumulations or our scientific progresses but the fact remains that we are not the doer.

When Arjuna in the midst of the battlefield is bewildered and refused to fight? Krishna asks him why do people think that they are the doers when actually it is the three modes of material nature doing everything.

prakrteh kriyamanani
gunaih karmani sarvasah
kartaham iti manyate (BG 3.27)
The bewildered spirit soul, under the influence of the three modes of material nature, thinks himself to be the doer of activities, which are in actuality carried out by nature.

How long we will think of lording over nature and take advantage of it to satisfy our cravings. It is but inevitable that nature will take revenge one day.

But the best part is that now as we remain indoors it is the nature which takes a breather. The air is purer, we can hear the birds chirp and the animals are free to roam as they like. At least let us be happy about that.


Filed under Lessons, short musings

Be the process

In the endeavour to better oneself it is important to keep on analysing one. And the standard by which one which one has to measure oneself is the Bhagavad Gita. Because in the Gita the Lord has clearly mentioned all those qualities which makes a person better and makes her or him beloved of Him.

Shri Caitanya Mahhaprabhu has left just 8 verses called as the Siksastakam or His 8 fold instructions.

You can read the entire text here but one verse is my absolute favourite:

trinad api sunichena
taror api sahishnuna
amanina manadena
kirtaniyah sada harih

One should chant the holy name of the Lord in a humble state of mind, thinking oneself lower than the straw in the street; one should be more tolerant than a tree, devoid of all sense of false prestige, and should be ready to offer all respect to others. In such a state of mind one can chant the holy name of the Lord constantly.

If you read the words clearly ‘lower than a straw in the street and tolerant than a tree’….It is good to read isn’t it? But is it so easy? I mean so humble that anyone can step on you and so tolerant that you stand tall in rain or shine, cold or heat is not easy at all. Maintaining your cool even if someone insults you or takes you for granted is not easy at all.

You may think where is she heading? Let me elaborate. Growing up in Bhilai I was an outsider because I was the so called ‘Madrasi’. Everyone belonging south was a Madrasi. Then when I came down South I was the person who had lived in hte North, so again an outsider. When I was in Bahrain I was an outsider. So technically I have never belonged but that doesn’t matter either because the only thing that matters is that I belong to Krishna. But what irks me is when people show their superiority.  This place doesn’t have good vegetables as my place. This place doesn’t really have any seasons. People from North re aggressive. People from South are shallow. And then it becomes personal too sometimes. How can you be so quiet? Your son is quiet too just like a girl. Why is he wearing pink? Isn’t pink for girls? My son heard the last quote and was quite candid, ‘Krishna made all the colours, he didn’t label any colour as for boys or girls’. End of argument.

Which made me think that though Krishna said,

amanitvam adambhitvam
ahimsa ksantir arjavam
acaryopasanam saucam
sthairyam atma-vinigrahah

Humility, pridelessness, nonviolence, tolerance, simplicity, approaching a bona fide spiritual master, cleanliness, steadiness and self-control are some of the constituents of the path of knowledge.(BG 13.8)

And all these qualities are so difficult to adapt. Arent we prone to boasting or to flaunt ourselves. Humility is really a very difficult virtue. I mean how do you or what do you do when you are attacked or insulted. How can you be aloof?

We often tend to forget that every individual, society or nation has its own plus points and minus but who are we to judge. Why is it so difficult to accept the other just as they are. The answer is ignorance. We like to gloat to show our importance because we don’t know how good the other person is.

But does that mean we accept others insults, their taunts because we are humble. To a limit maybe yes but not always. Humility and tolerance should be to a limit that your confidence is not shaken. I will repeat a story often told before:

Narad muni met a snake who was very aggressive. He explained to the snake the virtues of non violence. The good teacher that he is, Naradmuni converted the snake to the path of non violence and went his way. After sometime when he returned he thought of meeting the snake again to see how he was doing. He finds the snake in a battered condition. Though the snake had turned non violent, the people didn’t know about it and thinking him to be dangerous had beat him black and blue. Narad muni smiled and said, ‘Child, yes you are non violent now but when people were attacking you, you could have shown your fangs, they would have run away.’

And that is what we have to do. Be humble, respectful and nonviolent but when attacked show your fangs politely.

It is a long way when all the people respect each other and not show superiority, it will be a long time before the North South divide is crossed. ( to tell the truth we show solidarity and unity only when we are abroad). But World peace begins with individual transformation; let the others be; let’s start our transformation now.

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Filed under free writing, Lessons, Uncategorized

From ignorance to light

Life throws up surprises every now and then. Like you are doing good in your job and suddenly the business shuts shop. Or you are a businessman but you suffer multiple losses. Life can be so unpredictable. Like you are happy, you have finished with your responsibilities and you want to relax and suddenly you discover that you have a lump which is not just a lump.

No, this is not about me.

When I read blogs I often feel it unrealistic. We write about the urban upper class but what about the towns and the villages. Isn’t there a story there.

What about common life, why has it become so uncommon?Quotefancy-1520040-3840x2160

As I said earlier there is so much to write about in the mundane.

I think about life, the ordinary struggles and the shocks and the surprises we keep getting now and then and I want to unravel the mystery.

I know a lady who has raised her two children singlehandedly. her husband is somewhere. I do not know whether her husband was an alcoholic or abusive or both. I never asked. I didn’t want to hurt her anymore than what she was already hurting. But heard that her husband used to come now and then demand money, take and leave.Until one day her son now grown up and earning, threw him out and threatened him.

Out of curiosity I had asked her son once, why your mother tolerates him. He just replied mother can never refuse beggars.

And then it hit me. She was not tolerating him, neither was she doing it as a sense of responsibility. She was doing it as a duty. the duty of a human not a wife; of helping those who are needy. was she right, was she wrong? I am not going to judge her but I realised that every scene has so many angles.

Life when it wants just to show some angles, it throws some surprises. And then the Lord, the witness watches how we deal with it. I look back at my journey from March 31st 2004 and see how I have evolved and with all humility I bow down and hope that I have evolved well. It was that day I discovered that I had pituitary adenoma which subsequently lead me to partial darkness and the knowledge that I have to be on support of external hormones but it has led me to an absolutely delightful journey of self discovery. A discovery which earlier I may not have embarked upon earlier. Have I been good or have I been bad, I will not judge but the fact is that today I am grateful that I had the chance to see so many ups and downs to discover myself.

Someone very dear is going through the same trials. I just hope that she too takes this opportunity to discover self.

The shloka in my mind:

tesam evanukampartham aham ajnana-jam tamah
nasayamy atma-bhava-stho jnana-dipena bhasvata
Out of compassion for them, I, dwelling in their hearts, destroy with the shining lamp of knowledge the darkness born of ignorance. (BG 10.11)







Filed under free writing, Lessons, personal, realization

Old clothes/new clothes

Appa looked out from the window. It was a sunny day. Everyone had put their clothes out to dry. Suddenly he became thoughtful and sat down.

Susheela came and asked,’ Appa I made some bondas, shall I bring them here or will you come to the dining table?’

‘No, Susheela, I am not hungry, maybe later’, said Appa.

‘What has happened to you Appa, you used to enjoy eating….you hardly eat now’, complained Susheela

‘What do you see outside, Susheela?’, asked Appa.

‘Clothes put for drying’, said Susheela.

‘You wash clothes when it is dirty and then when it cannot be used any further; what do you do with it Susheela?’, asked Appa

‘Throw it away’, she replied.

‘I too need a new body Susheela, this one has become useless’, said Appa

Susheela stood there transfixed not knowing what to say.

‘Free me from all this entanglements Susheela, let me go, I cannot carry on any further’, he added

Tears welled up in Susheela’s eyes and she rushed out.

She rushed to the other room where Arjun, her husband was working on his laptop she  leaned on his shoulder and started weeping.

‘What happened Sush’, a concerned Arjun asked.

Susheela repeated what Appa had said. Arjun was thoughtful. It was true that from some days his father was tired. His wife was too attached to her father in law. She was an orphan and had been raised in an orphanage. his father had met her on a routine visit to the orphanage, liked her and got her married to his son.  Like a mother he had trained her to be a good companion.Their camaraderie was so good that sometimes he felt jealous.

‘Maybe it is time for him to be free Sush, don’t hold him back. His body is battered, let him go’, said Arjun

‘ I will be an orphan again’, said she.

Arjun sighed. ‘For your selfish interests,how long will he carry his worn out body Sush’, he asked.

Susheela looked at him with her swollen eyes.

Some days later Appa left his body.

Susheela sat near his body reminiscing the old days mumbling under her breathe, ‘may you get a better body appa and better companions too’.

Bhagavad Gita chapter 2 Shloka 22 says:

vasamsi jirnani yatha vihaya navani grhnati naro ‘parani
tatha sarirani vihaya jirnany anyani samyati navani dehi
As a person puts on new garments, giving up old ones, similarly, the soul accepts new material bodies, giving up the old and useless ones.
A time will come when each one of us will have to leave this body and take on a new one. Our effort should be to get a better body and a better life.
Today is Day 2 of Write Tribe Festival of words






Filed under Lessons, short story, Slices of life

What is your biggest fear?

What is that you really fear?’, I asked

Some said Death,  what happens if I die, what will happen to my children?  Some said uncertainty. Some said they are afraid of hurting someone and so on…

‘I am afraid that I will not be  able to bring my son to the path of spirituality’, I said and continued….

Nitai Sevini Mataji in one of her lectures has said, ‘ as a woman, as a mother and your success as a mother  depends  on whether you succeed in kindling/ awakening the love for Krishna in your child’s heart.’

But to do that are you equipped enough? Have you realised the truth yourself? How will you convince your child, if you are not convinced yourself?

A mother once took her child to a saint, ‘Swamiji,my son eats too much of chocolates even though the Dentist has asked him not to. His teeth have begun to rot and yet he doesn’t listen to me. Swamiji thought a while and asked her to come with her child after four days. The lady returned after four days, the Swami called the boy near him, patted him on his back and said lovingly, ‘Son stop eating chocolates from today else you will lose all your teeth’ The woman took the child home. But from that day he never ate any chocolates. His mother was astonished. She returned to the Swami in some days and asked, ‘Swamiji when I asked my son not to eat chocolates he didn’t listen to me but you said once he listened. How?  And why did you call us after four days when you could ask him to stop the very first day. The Swami smiled  and said, ‘I couldn’t advise him the very first day because I too had the habit of eating chocolates. How could I convince him without convincing myself? That is why I called you in four days. First I convinced myself and then when I advised him, he listened.

So How good are you or how good is your sadhana? First make yourself capable to bring your child to the path of bhakti.

Firstly do you believe that Krishna indeed is the supreme personality of Godhead?  Yes, He is. In the eighth  shloka  of the tenth chapter He himself proclaims to be so.

aham sarvasya prabhavo mattah sarvam pravartate
iti matva bhajante mam budha bhava-samanvitah
I am the source of all spiritual and material worlds. Everything emanates from Me. The wise who know this perfectly engage in My devotional service and worship Me with all their hearts.
So when He himself is proclaiming that I am the source, is there any scope of doubt.

Secondly, how surrendered are you?  Are you willing, are you ready toallow him to take charge of yourself? In the 66th shloka of the 18th chapter Krishna says

sarva-dharman parityajya mam ekam saranam vraja
aham tvam sarva-papebhyo moksayisyami ma sucah
Abandon all varieties of religion and just surrender unto Me. I shall deliver you from all sinful reaction. Do not fear.
Such a beautiful assurance. He will take care. Full stop.

Thirdly, what are you going to do to satisfy or to make Krishna happy? This needs practise. Your consciousness should change from me to Him. Meaning whatever you do, you should do with the bhava of satisfying Him.

To develop this bhava it is not so difficult. Show your gratitude in every step? Thank him for what He has given you.  Thank Him for the home that He has given you, thank him for the food, thank Him for the bed you sleep on etc.

Once you come to the level of gratitude start  your devotional service with the nine ‘angas’ ofdevotional service- shravanam, kirtanam, Vishnu smaranam, pada sevanam,  vandanam, arcanam, dasyam, sakhyam,  atma nivedanam.

And what happens when you become a devotee and serve Him?

sa evayam maya te ‘dya yogah proktah puratanah
bhakto ‘si me sakha ceti rahasyam hy etad uttamam (4.3)
That very ancient science of the relationship with the Supreme is today told by Me to you because you are My devotee as well as My friend; therefore you can understand the transcendental mystery of this science.
One of the advantages of becoming a devotee is that the wisdom flows through us, the most confidential knowledge is unveiled
ananyas cintayanto mam ye janah paryupasate
tesam nityabhiyuktanam yoga-ksemam vahamy aham
But those who worship Me with devotion, meditating on My transcendental form-to them I carry what they lack and preserve what they have.
Understand this carefully, He carries what we lack and preserves what we have. Isn’t that wonderful!!

 So those are just two inferences which happen when you become a devotee. In my own life I have witnessed how Lord has held me in His hands and led me out of difficult circumstances.

Once you are firm with your belief, start with your child? For this there is a simple acronym RIP. Rip through maya, from this material existence. And what is this RIP :

Read with the child books like BhagavadGita, Bhagvatam, CaitanyaCaritamrita. Read at least for half an hour. Let the child soak in our heritage through our books

Involve them in activities like aarti, altar cleaning and decoration, preparing of bhoga.

Prasadam. Prasadam is potent.Feed them sumptuous prasadam.  And see how they evolve

Excerpts from a class taken on 15th May@ Bahrain


Filed under Lessons, Slices of life, Uncategorized

Of faith and belief

I started the New Year in an exceptional way. I got up at 5.30 in the morning and went to the washroom. A pair of eyes looked straight at me. I went into shock…and then it ran and then I noticed that it had a tail too. And then I screamed.

But nobody heard me. I took a stick and tried to bring it out but then thought otherwise; how could I control it if it came out.

I gathered my wits, closed the door of the washroom and ran to the neighbours who stay  upstairs as they too get up early. At first they didn’t open the door but then when they did, uncle who must be in his late 60s immediately came down. Trapped the rat and threw it away.

I thanked him immensely and just bowed down at the altar, I just had to thank the Lord for such good neighbours.

Some months back, my gas cylinder ran out and I could not connect the regulator to the spare cylinder. In Bahrain I never had to do all that and now I didn’t know how to do it. Son had to go to school and I had to prepare his tiffin. Again the neighbour next door came running and helped me out.

Managing alone when the husband is away in another place or country is not easy. There are so many things to be done. But then the point is we are so very illusioned especially in today’s age.

We think that we are the doers but the point is that not even a blade of grass moves without the will of the Lord

And when I think of this statement….I am filled with gratitude for everything; the home I live in, the food I eat, the neighbours I have, everything. The Lord has seen that I can stay comfortably and even if there are some problems He sees that they are solved.

Earlier there have been sleepless nights worrying about something or the other, now I sleep just like a baby because I know that He is taking care.

Everyday I understand new facets of the shloka: ananyas cintayanto mam ye janah paryupasate
tesam nityabhiyuktanam yoga-ksemam vahamy aham (BG 9.22-

But those who worship Me with devotion, meditating on My transcendental form-to them I carry what they lack and preserve what they have.)
We often stay trapped in the words I, me, myself whereas in actuality, we can do nothing, whatever we do is in illusion; maya. As kids we were so happy knowing that parents are there to take care of us. As adults too it is so easy to just have faith and believe that He will take care.
Yesterday was my weekly Bhagvad Gita class. Later the Head Mistress asked me, ‘Why were you walking slowly mataji, are your legs paining?’. I said, ‘ No, I just walk slowly because I don’t see properly’. I could see that she wanted to ask me how, so I told her. And then she asked me a question that I am often asked, ‘ How do you manage mataji’.
And that question always makes me smile because what is there to manage when He is taking care.
It is very easy to quote scriptures but the real knowledge starts to flow in when you really start believing and surrendering yourself.



Filed under Lessons, personal


Questions scare us. Most of us have had sleepless nights thinking about which questions the examination paper will hold or which question the interviewer will ask. The latter is more scarier. Because whether the answer is right or wrong doesn’t matter. What matters is that the answer is in sync with the interviewers line of thought. Now how can we know what is in the mind of somebody and what does he really want to know. That is another difficult question.

In the great Mahabharata war, Dhritarasthra had asked such a question. We all know that Dhritarashtra was blind but he was desirous of knowing what is happening n the war. Vedvyas who also happens to be his uncle blesses Sanjaya who happens to be Dhritarashtra’s adviser with divine eyesight. which means that even though Sanjay is far away he is able to ‘see’ what is happening  in the battlefield. Dhritarashtra is very happy with this arrangement.
So the Bhagavad Gita which means the song of the Lord begins with Dhritarashtra asking Sanjaya
dhrtarastra uvaca
dharma-ksetre kuru-ksetre
samaveta yuyutsavah
mamakah pandavas caiva
kim akurvata sanjaya
Dhrtarastra said: O Sanjaya, after assembling in the place of pilgrimage at Kuruksetra, what did my sons and the sons of Pandu do, being desirous to fight?
It seems that Dhritarashtra just wants to know what is happening on the battlefield but that is  not so simple. He is more concerned with his sons. He being guardian of his brothers son; he should have been impartial but he was not. At every point we  can see his selfishness,- when Draupadi was disrobes, when the game of dice took place…every moment his partiality can be seen.
So in this shloka Dhritarashtra doesn’t really want to know what is happening… he really wants to know whether his sons are winning.
But technically he knows what the result will be because he says ‘Dharmashetre. So in dharmashetre nothing wrong happens, truth wins. So it is evident that Pandavas will win because they are on the side of dharma.
Sanjaya like a clever interviewee knows what is in the mind of Dhritarashtra. And instead of answering directly he dodges the question. He tells about the military formation, the might of both sides and so on.
Its only at the end when Krishna has finished advising Arjuna and Arjuna has fully surrendered that Sanjay answers the question by saying
yatra yogesvarah krsno
yatra partho dhanur-dharah
tatra srir vijayo bhutir
dhruva nitir matir mam
Wherever there is Krsna, the master of all mystics, and wherever there is Arjuna, the supreme archer, there will also certainly be opulence, victory, extraordinary power, and morality. That is my opinion.
So what a clever person Sanjaya is. He is diplomatic, sharp, well versed in language and yet delivers the message subtly
That is how we have to answer interviews too, confuse the interviewer a little dodge a little, scrutinize some more and yet deliver the message.
Interestingly the Bhagavad Gita also gives us tips on how to ask a question. But it is more related to questioning your guru
tad viddhi pranipatena
pariprasnena sevaya
upadeksyanti te jnanam
jnaninas tattva-darsinah (4.34)
Just try to learn the truth by approaching a spiritual master. Inquire from him submissively and render service unto him. The self-realized soul can impart knowledge unto you because he has seen the truth.
So a golden message given here, be submissive. It’s only when the egos are down that anything can be learnt.
There is a story which comes to mind. When Raavana is about to leave his body, Shri Ram advises Lakshmana to go and approach him ans get some knowledge. Lakshmana goes and stands near his head. Raavana refuses to acknowledge him. Lakshmana goes back to his brother and says that Raavana didn’t acknowledge him. Ram laughs and sends him back saying that he should stand near his feet with his palms folded and enquire submissively.  Lakshmana does so and is blessed with Raavanas wisdom.
translation of shlokas courtesy


Filed under Lessons, Uncategorized